I remember the time when we had just come back (early 90s) after living in the America for almost 10 years (exile), a place where people are usually more sensitive to such ‘color’ issues and are quite careful what they say…. at least in front of you.
It was Chinese New Year and it was our 1st year back in Malaysia, so we did the usual customary visiting to one of my father’s friends who lived in Kepong Baru, which was(is) quite a Chinese area. This man had some influence over my earlier days as he was the one who taught me pugilism (shao-lin kung fu) when I was young-er (ahem) ; I was his ardent student.
And so it was proper that I should pay the usual respects to the now old man (in his late 80s), visited with him and introduced my wife to him.
After gesturing to us to sit I heard him say to himself “ uhr..m ..yat kor ngap .. yat kor kai..) The direct translation is “one is duck and one is chicken.” Hilarious and he was not making a joke either.. (LOL)
I did not tell Linda as it would have been a spoiler for the day, but it was the first time we had be referred to as ‘duck and chicken’. How you like dat? I ve been called quite some many things before … but a duck? Or was it chicken? Well, I didn’t ask.
One other time was when we were in a coffee shop. As is common during lunch hour when the masses throng the limited available seats and free seating is the order of the day. I had already gotten my plate of food in my hand and was making my way over to where Linda was already seated and tucking in her meal. At the same table with her was a Chinese woman ( auntie around 40s) who was just looking (hard) at her (Linda) and like studying intently her face, and poor Linda was pretending not to notice. And so I took my seat with them and observe a while..
We are quite used to people giving polite glances, but this was a 'full on' stare. I decided I didn’t need to hide my stare at her either… watching her study Linda so intently. It must have been half a minute or so when she suddenly realized I was watching her studying my wife’s face. Suddenly embarrassed, and sensing perhaps my relationship with this “other” woman was more than just sharing a table… she looked at me and blurted out “ Eh .. leh low bor ah” ( your wife ah?). Typical 'ah soh' response.
I smile,.. but didn’t answer … instead asked .. “ Lang – moh” - translated : beautiful or not ??? (And Linda’s eyes open wide horrified….obviously linguistically aware).
She shot back, true to form . .and spoken with Chinese sarcasm …” Kan hai ler.. Erm Mai Leh Oi –aah “ coarse translation – of course lah !!. otherwise would you (have) want-(ed)? “
We both had a laugh. ( and Linda quite embarrassed and probably would have denied me ).
My most memorable was an encounter with a friend whose name is Ramu. (an Indian whose name has been truncated otherwise it would be too much of a mouthful). We met once a week and because we both played guitar we were on the worship team (only 2 ) for the lunchtime Full Gospel Businessmen meetings on Fridays. Over the period of a couple of years we’ve come to know each other quite well.
Ramu’s problem was that he had a friar’s patch that was growing (balding on the top) and at that time I had a ‘solution’ which claimed to put hair on your chest and elsewhere too. And so we decided to meet and introduce this product to him and since it was somewhat a business opportunity, I insisted we should get his wife’s involvement as well. And so we set up a meeting with both our spouses along....
While driving over, I remembered the call from Ramu over the handphone …
Ramu: so we are going to meet aah?
Me: yes bro .. your wife is going to be there..?
Ramu: Yes, but I want to tell you something first before we meet, ok?
Me: .. . Er.. yeah.. sure.. what is it?... anything?
Ramu: Yah .. my wife... err ..she's not Indian ok. . actually.. she's Chinese.
Me: . . .Oh(?) …okaaaaay . . …….. aaand ….?
Ramu: …and er nothing .. just don’t want you to be surprised when you meet her.
Me: oh.. .ok no problem Ramu. Of course not. See you soon.
Click.
Pause.
Linda (in the car with me), and gathering from the conversation was equally stunned , somehow as it didn’t occur to me (that moment) maybe I should have also offered the same courtesy(?).
My wife not chinese but indian,… but it was too late now and to call him back would be awkward.
Yeah we did up meet after that, and it still brings a chuckle.
(Oh btw.. please don’t ask about my ‘solution’ for hair growth…. that’s another story altogether)
The end.
18.10.09
.Err...chicken and duck ? .. no it was ox tail stew..hmm
a hahahahahahah!!! i like the Ramu story the best!
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