This post was written in Jan 2021 in my phone 'notes' section. I forgot to put it in here.
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| Random picture on my phone |
I'm writing this still in my bed and the sleep still in my eyes. I want to capture the reality and lesson of last night while still fresh in my spirit.
The past few days I've been feeling some despair over my predicament. These feelings come on and off, but in between sleep during the night, was the worst: 'thoughts' of how to deal with xxxx, or preventative (proactive) measures preoccupied my mind.
In the middle of the night, in between sleep is the worst. During those times I could feel the despair in my body even as I tried my best to fall back asleep.
But the mind is engaged to 'solve' the problem.
Then suddenly I rmbr the words of jp, 'your problems shall BE food' for you to bring you HIGHER , You shall eat them and draw strength from them.
Even as I was pondering how I was to 'appropriate' this nugget of wisdom, I could literally 'feel' the fear lift.. gone, immediately!
Not exaggerating.
I 'look' for it but (the fear) it just disappeared.
PTL
Then I realize how cunningingly stealth the enemy is in masquerading these thoughts as our own. And even as we mull on how to "responsibly address these situations" facing us, we cannot but feel the despair.
The spiritual is more real than we realize.
But God is on our side (literally); the very moment we turn our thoughts to him the whole resources of heaven comes invading against the works of the enemy.
I didn't have to psych myself out of my despair, no it ran away.
Disappeared.
I could feel sleep coming over, I fell asleep literally in the beautiful arms of Jesus.
Are the problems facing us still there? , well, we don't know.
We are so limited and small, better we leave it at the feet of the One who is all wise and powerful. He is able to deal for us.
I'm so grateful for that.
Thank you Jesus
